People/Parker

(Up to People)

Parker is an angry man who gets angry at Worms

Favourite strategies:

• Pointing out that Run is in the lead
• Trying to convince everyone to attack Run
• Pointing out that even when Run isn't in the lead, he's guaranteed to get a Scales of Justice and win the game
• Moaning at anyone who doesn't do everything possible to attack Run
• Threatening to lolocaust¹ them
• Blaming them when Run wins
• Collecting crates instead of making any effort himself to attack Run
• Claiming the crates are too shit for him to do anything to Run when anyone points this out
• Claiming the crates are too shit for him to carry out any of his promised lolocausts

Being Wrong:

Parker is no stranger to being wrong - he does it all the time. Some scientists have suggested that he would be a worthy subject for study due to his apparent state of perpetual wrongness. However, there has only been one known occurance of him actually admitting to being wrong - it was a relatively small point, but still noteworthy due to the fact that known history contains no other events of this kind. The statement came shortly after a claim that Cleveland, Ohio is landlocked, and was uttered thus: "oh i'd be wrong"

¹victimising them exclusively in a future game